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Re: Anger and bitterness

Posted by Racer on April 27, 2006, at 13:45:24

In reply to Anger and bitterness, posted by fairywings on April 27, 2006, at 12:49:49

You can't wipe it out of your memory. You'll just have to go through it and get to the other side.

I don't know how to do that, though.

SOmething similar came up yesterday in my session, though, with my T giving the exact opposite comment: "This will always be a part of you, so we have to create ways to counter it." I don't know how that's done, beyond the usual countering it with better thoughts, using better coping strategies, etc.

How that applies to bitterness, though, I can only guess.

My guess, though, is that it would include letting go of the present anger. To me, bitterness kinda implies that you're holding on to the anger until its target rights the perceived wrong. That's not quite what I mean, but it might be close enough. I think, anyway, that to get over bitterness, you kinda have to accept that people [anglo saxon word that's not allowed here] up in your past, that you were damaged by it, that they'll never be able to empathize and therefore will never apologize, be angry with them for those failures, and then grieve for those losses. I think that's probably at least part of what has to happen to let go of bitterness.

I hope that's helpful.


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060422/msgs/637503.html