Posted by special_k on April 5, 2006, at 2:40:15
In reply to Re: Boundaries -- both personal and professional » Deneb, posted by Racer on April 5, 2006, at 1:31:13
hrm.
yeah lots of issues around this stuff for a lot of peoples methinks...i learned in dbt that it was always okay to ask, so long as one can accept that the answer might be 'no'.
but some things...
i think the trouble with pushing boundaries is that people tend to withdraw a little / put up defenses / remain 'on guard' when they become aware that someone repeatedly encroaches on their boundaries.
i feel a little pissed off when someone encroaches on my boundaries too. especially when it must be apparant to them that i'm not happy about it. hard to know what bob is feeling i guess and that makes it harder... but i guess we just have to go by what he says. i'm thinking here of guys especially... when i think i'm being pretty clear that i'm not interested but they still seem to think they can make an advance or something. i think that if you are aware... you can read how someone is feeling. and if you are making them uncomfortable... if they are awkward... then i guess back off. is kind of polite and respectful. but hard online because there aren't any cues (aside from words).
i used to have a friend who used to tickle me suddenly.
it hurt kinda and i didn't like it too much but i guess 'cause i was laughing...
but i was always alert around her and never could relax...
never could let my guard down.
amusing for her i guess but not so fun for me.
i dunno.
how ya doing deneb?
pretty complicated, huh.
poster:special_k
thread:626334
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060331/msgs/629069.html