Posted by ClearSkies on May 2, 2006, at 23:27:50
In reply to Re: T cancelled AGAIN!!! » ClearSkies, posted by fairywings on May 2, 2006, at 20:31:23
I went through 4 Ts in 6 months. The 1st one retired her practice, the 2nd one was the one with the time problem; also she never seemed to be able to grasp the issues I was struggling with. So leaving was a relief, except for (groan!!) having to start ALL OVER AGAIN with a new T. The 3rd one made inappropriate disclosures about her personal life, and encouraged me to join her church. I ran away quickly from her (and later found out that she'd even lost her license by the time I was seeing her!). The 4th one, for me, is a charm. We have the same expectations and she's excellent at reading my moods, often before I'm totally aware of them.
Each bad experience taught me more about what I wanted from a therapeutic relationship, and what didn't suit me at all. I think I'm pretty picky, and it has been important for me to learn that when a therapist is not working out well for me, I'm better off finding another one rather than twisting my head around to try to make an awkward fit better. Therapy *has* to be a safe place for me, especially when we're working on particularly triggering things.
I have to know that the person who is helping with my treatment has the same goals and standards that I do. For me that means - both of us showing up for appointments. Both of us being present for appointments (not the same thing, eh?). Both of us comfortable with asking for clarification from the other.
CS
poster:ClearSkies
thread:639220
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060422/msgs/639497.html