Posted by Gracie2 on August 8, 2001, at 16:38:24
I see my Dad only once or twice a year because he lives in some exotic place being an architectural engineer. When we do meet, there are kisses on the cheek, how's the weather, very polite, let's-do-lunch-again-sometime. It's very shallow and impersonal and makes me sad.
This year I decided that things would be different, that I would force him into more personal conversation. The thing that has always bothered me most about my Dad is that he's never said a single word to me about the death of my brother. Not one
word. My brother died in a military aircrash and there is a memorial at Fort Campbell for the soldiers who died on the plane. I took out the pictures and placed them on the table in front of my Dad:Dedicated to the memory of the 248 soldiers of Task Force 3-502, multinational force and observers, 101st
Airborne Division (Air Assault)who perished at Gander, Newfoundland while returning home from peacekeeping duty in the Sinai Peninsula.
"Our courageous peacekeepers
have departed our midst suddenly.
And they have ascended to heights
Where even Screaming Eagles can't fly."My dad took off his glasses, and he began to weep. I was shocked beyond belief. Dad doesn't show his feelings; I thought prehaps we could discuss MINE, because I'm still having a terrible time handling Shayne's death. I never meant to hurt him. I've never seen my father cry.
When I got home, my husband was disgusted with me. He said, "You wanted to get a reaction out of him, and you did. What's the problem?" I couldn't believe he said that to me. I took a beer out of the refrigerator and he said, "Oh no." He snatched it away from me. "That always just makes you worse." He sounded repulsed.I don't know what to do now. I feel like shoving everything I can fit into my hatchback and moving down to the Louisiana swamps, where nobody will ever find me. I don't know what to do.
-Gracie
poster:Gracie2
thread:8982
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010807/msgs/8982.html