Posted by Jayy on May 25, 2009, at 16:05:43
In reply to Re: Ever Been In An 'Intensive Outpatient Program' » Jayy, posted by softheprairie on May 24, 2009, at 2:25:08
Howdy Prairie,
That's great that you have your moms support. I'm sure this is easy to say as I obviously don't know you or her, but I imagine that your mother doesnt look at you as a burden at all.
Do you know how long you have to wait until you can get the Medicare? I thought that would automatically come with the disability?
I've seen hoarders on several TV shows and it doesn't look fun to experience. :O( I dont hoard, but I can imagine the mental hell it must be to feel compelled to save so much and the anxiety of trying to get things in order... and where to even begin. It just sounds like mental torment, which is always horrible in any form.
That's so nice of your Psychiatrist to recommend that you see him more despite knowing that you cant afford to do so. Offer to reduce your co payments/give you any type of discount?? Of course not... you'd like to think that mental health professionals actually care more about helping people than pocketing every possible dime that they can, but it never seems to be that way.
The last freak I saw (the Psychologist that wasted 8 months of my life on himself) agreed to see me because he accepted Medicare but instead of charging me a co payment he just fraudulently charged Medicare for two 70 minute sessions each week, when I only saw him once a week for an hour.
At first I thought "Oh, what a nice guy he is to do that since he knows I cant afford his co payment... he must really care." But then after getting to know him and seeing his huge luxurious house with the huge built in pool in the shape of a lake, his own tennis courts, several luxury cars, etc, etc... I was thinking "You're a disgusting penny pinching lying thief fraud who only gives a f**k about money and yourself."
Yeah... I dont think walking with you and/or feeding the ducks sounds very helpful at all. I would not have been thrilled with that either. But I see that you then later did have a little turn around. :O) I'm glad that you're feeling somewhat better now... I do hope you find yourself someone helpful though.
And thanks for the info on the vocational rehab program/legal info on that: It's a topic that horrifies me though. I havent had a job in around 18 years, I'm probably qualified for nothing and I could not possibly imagine being viewed as the 40 year old freak working at MacDonald's (or similar) with a bunch of teenagers. I need to be able to feel some small bit of dignity if I'm to ever be in a job around others and I dont know how that will ever work out.
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> > But what did you end up doing after those experiences? Were you able to find any decent help at a better place? I hope so.
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> Went back home, then back to my psychiatrist who does both meds and therapy w/ me, but it still didn't help that much. I especially needed professional help at home to deal w/ my hoarding that was out of control and I had lots of vermin taking over. I was not able to locate any free or affordable help. My psychiatrist recommended a woman who had experience going to people's homes working w/ this condition, but she didn't have a graduate degree/therapist license, so she can only hold herself out to be a mental health case manager (and licensed mental health technician, which she also is). So, my insurance wouldn't cover her. My mother paid her privately.
> It made a huge difference in my life, even though extremely anxiety- and meltdown-producing on a regualr basis when she was here, but we had to taper down and then discontinue because it was too expensive for us to continue. My clutter has started heading back into the pathological, but I just live with it alone for now. (I have other psychiatric problems in addition to that.)
> My mom has continued to take from her savings to keep me privately insured under COBRA w/ the plan of my former employer until I can get Medicare (I am on disability), but I have to pay the co-pays and deductibles. My psychiatrist recommends that I see him more, but I can't afford to in terms of co-pays, and I've said that, and he hasn't offered any cost reduction.
> It's all so complicated. I tried out being a client of "case management" from the local community mental health center, which "treated" me for a reasonable fee as a poor person, but the case mgr. wouldn't come into my house, which was what I was needing the assistance with. She would only do things out in public like go walking with me or feeding the ducks bread at the park. So, I discontinued that after about a month of meeting about weekly.
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> Isn't it just so devastating and so disappointing and frustrating to need actual help and yet get essentially nothing???
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> Yes, absolutely. You hit the nail on the head. My ongoing money woes are a big part of my depression, and when I was in the waiting period before recieving SSDI was when I was hospitalized, when my thoughts of suicide were so abundant, and I just felt like such a burden to my mother. :(
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> But, I had a turn for the better aroud a year after that, where other meds seemed to click and do better, or maybe my brain made some changes I don't understand, but, anyways, I'm still struggling all the time, but it's better than the time where suicide was on my mind a lot and I was crying all the time.
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> Oh, I also wanted to mention that I tried Vocational Rehabilitation, and it didn't work out for me, but I was advised to apply again with them after I am more stable med-wise (and not breaking down crying at every interaction with then), and I am thinking of trying again. They sometimes pay for some mental health treatment, although I read through an online manual of how my state's operates, and it looks like they only pay at the state's (inadequate) Medicaid rate, so if you already have Medicare plus Medicaid, it may not be anything additional. You could call them and ask, though, if you're wanting to end up with employment. And, here's a tidbit I bet not too many people know: each state has a legally-required disability rights center (they go by different names) that take on cases in the interests of disabled folks, sometimes against inadequate service at the community mental health center, and also sometimes suing to make Voc. Rehab. cover more things. You can look up the one in your state.
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poster:Jayy
thread:897113
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090515/msgs/897610.html