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Re: CBT

Posted by sunny10 on November 8, 2004, at 13:27:08

In reply to Re: CBT » sunny10, posted by gardenergirl on November 8, 2004, at 12:41:12

> How funny...I didn't start therapy til I was 37. I started right in with dynamic, which is good. I can't leave the past in the past...it's what I learned. I have to figure it out in relationship to what I know and do today. And to release the pain. I suppose releasing the pain and letting that go is important, but you have to look at it to do that.
>
> And maybe I'm negative today cause I stepped in doggie doo doo. At least I was wearing my garden clogs. D'oh!
>
> gg

That's how I feel- that I can't "get over it" until I sort THROUGH it and DEAL with it before
it WILL go away! That's why I feel like the therapy is a bust.

Long story short...suffered depression as long as I can remember.
OD'd in my junior year of high school. Was told I was a spoiled little girl who needed to grow up. Forced into pdoc and therapy where the therapist focussed on "learning to behave like a grown up"- didn't want to know about my childhood or WHY I had learned to think the way that I do.

OD'd in my fourth year of marriage to escape an emotional abuser. (Talk to Susan47 about "sharks"-this will seem more clear). I was again told to grow up/forced into pdoc and therapist focussed on "coping skills".

Slit my wrists while going through divoce and custody battles (court gave son to husband BEFORE I slit wrists- it was why I did)Was told again to grow up/forced into pdoc and therapy based on "coping skills".

OD'd by accident last winter- so desperate to sleep while suffering depression-induced insomnia. Frankly, WOULDN'T have cared if I didn't wake up- but hospital, upon seeing that I was 37 didn't even bother with suggesting pdoc or therapy and told me to go home. I started the pdoc and therapy myself this time- the "system" didn't even care to anymore. I guess at 37 in PA, USA you are allowed to die if you want- nobody even PRETENDS to care aymore.

But I care- I don't want to survive each day- I want to live it.

Sorry about the dog poo- did you see "envy", the movie, yet?? It will give you a few giggles. It's about a guy who invents "Va Poo rize", a spraycan which makes dog poo disappear. You'll laugh. It's silly, but we all NEED silly from time to time. I rented it at the Video Store on Saturday night.

-sunny10


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:sunny10 thread:409684
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041104/msgs/413326.html