Posted by maryhelen on May 5, 2003, at 14:18:17
In reply to Re: lostsailor's wedding dilemma .. maryhelen » maryhelen, posted by leeran on May 5, 2003, at 13:43:55
leeran:
There certainly is no magic pill to take to stop worrying about what other people think of us.
For me, I can't even say that I came to this point in therapy.
It has been an evolution, and a slow one at that, since my first hospilization in 1981. Over these many years of lying about my ilness and being ashamed that I have it, I have learned that I did not ask for this, I am tired of the stigma attached to mental illness, especially when I have seen people working so hard to get well, myself included.
I decided that, although it would be in a small way in the scheme of things, that anyone I know at work, friends, certainly family, will get an answer from me that I have depression. You would be amazed at the support and encouragement you could get because their either: are suffering from it themselves, or a parent is, a friend, etc. They welcome the chance to talk to me about it. This includes telling parents (I am school secretary, if they ask when I have been off on several leaves). That is the riskiest one of all but their response has been the same. If there are some that are judgemental I do not care and I find out, I don't care. What does it matter what that person thinks about me.
Maybe, it was easier for me because I knew I was amongst people who cared about me to begin with, but I will tell anyone if the situation arises.
I am too tired, it has been such a long battle, another med change, to worry anymore about what anyone thinks about me. No one is better than me because of their status in life or money, etc.. The funny part is, though, all of my energy is spent hating myself and thinking I am a poor excuse for a human being, that I am weak. I put the thinking of others onto myself. Yet, I have such respect for the courage of those to get the help they need and fighting, sometimes, what seems an never ending battle.
I just felt that, if this stigma that makes me so angry is going to change, then I, at least can do my small part.
I hope this post isn't too disjointed, this new med it getting to my head.
maryhelen
poster:maryhelen
thread:221053
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030426/msgs/224499.html