Posted by yourshadowself on April 10, 2003, at 18:40:10
In reply to Re: help with the stigma » mambo, posted by leeran on April 10, 2003, at 15:27:22
Hi, I am new to the board, and this is my first post, but I have been reading the recent posts for about the past week, as well as some archived effexor information.
Leeran, you are very eloquent and I really appreciated and identified with your first "help with the stigma" reply.
In my opinion, however, I think that being sensitive has less to do with one's birth order, and more to do with one's mental health (current or previous.) (I have also read THE NEW BIRTH ORDER BOOK)
I am a very sensitive person and I am the youngest child. I think that most of the birth order information is true, but that children with mental illness are the exception.
I feel the need to address a few of the points you made in your second reply, (my numbers are meant to corespond with yours.)
1) I also have always been more comfortable with adults than with my peers. My friends always told me and still tell me to "stop talking to [their] mom," because often i would spend more time talking to thier parents, than to my friends. I attribute this to my introspective nature which led possibly to more maturity and greater wisdom, and I attribute my introspective nature to my depression, anxiety, and obsessive compulisve disorder.
3) As far as being devistated when your parents are upset, I believe that all sensitive children are. My older sister used to randomly hit me because she was bored, but I wouldnt hit back because my parents would be mad at us for fighting, and I wouldnt tell my parents that I was assulted, becuase they would be mad at us for fighting reguardless if i did any of the fighting at all. So the result is that i took physical and verbal abuse from my sister and kept mum about it becuase my parent's feelings were more important to me.
4) As far as having a tougher exterior becuase of sibling fighting, i disagree. I do have excellent skills at fighting with my peers, and i do attribute part of this to being sensitive to know what their weakness is, and the other part to knowing how to use it against them (and this is from having the sibling.) But I do not have a tough exterior, fighting hurts alot, and I assume it hurts all sensitive people alot.
Becuase there are two types of pain,
a) the pain that makes you stronger (like exersize) and
b) the pain that only hurts you (like breaking your legs)
And in my opinion, fighting with your peers is the breaking leg sort of pain, where just because my legs may have been broken more times than yours, it doesnt mean that it hurts any less each time they are broken, because fighting is unconstructive.5) reading into things...
My friends have also always accused me of reading into things. I attribute this to OCD and depression.And finally, all people get lonely, youngest children get lonely too, espically when your sister is always off fighting with your parents.
But once again Leeran, i identified with much of what you said, and you are refreshingly eloquent. I look forward to more of your posts in the future.
love, shadow
poster:yourshadowself
thread:218105
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030407/msgs/218329.html