Posted by dreamer on September 1, 2001, at 19:38:22
This buried alive feeling with no coffin.The weirdest thing to feel this ill yet be horny at the same time it's beyond logic. Crying, and some drunk ringing my door buzzer forgotten a key. Hopeless , feeling of decay inside my body. Lethargic and lost.
I know it passes but how to pass the time with this heavy struggle and to eradicate this negativity.
I remember what Kazoo said in one post about moving a grain of sand playing a small part in the universe the wonder of it all- something like the butterfly's wings effect of the chaos theory?
Difficult to find a wonder.My first conscious thought as a very small child was get me out of here.
Then I'd xperience a wonder a euphoric moment that I would try to hold onto; the kid at the back of the classroom always laughing too much foolin around for a while/months, then dead silence withdrawal into the grave that seemed forever.
Bloody miserable and dreamless.
poster:dreamer
thread:10647
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010901/msgs/10647.html