Posted by Meatwood_Flack on February 3, 2013, at 20:07:53
In reply to falling in love with someone online, posted by Dr. Bob on February 2, 2013, at 22:03:31
I think factors such as isolation, loneliness, desperation, a dependent personality type and a vulnerability to impractical choices can all contribute to someone falling in love with someone they've never met. Shyness in social situations may also play a role, as long distance relationships (whether played out online or simply through letters and/or phone calls) come with a built in buffer of space, which may actually be preferable to some people. The first cause of the person's emotional vulnerability is probably more difficult to pin down, but an aversion to rejection based on life experience would certainly set the stage. People fall prey to dating scammers for the same reasons. Insecurities are very easy buttons to push when someone knows what and where they are. It could be argued that someone who cheats on their partner is, likewise, scamming. As far as traits people should look for in themselves to avoid falling prey, I think they could use the following questions to get a sense of their own vulnerability: 1. How healthy and strong is my sense of self-worth? 2. Am I more of a leader or follower? 3. Am I ruled more by intellect or emotion? 4. Am I more idealistic or practical? The difficulty of such an exercise lies in the fact that, while the unexamined life is truly not worth living, for many people, self-analysis does not occur to them.
poster:Meatwood_Flack
thread:1037180
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20120922/msgs/1037281.html