Posted by Daisym on December 14, 2011, at 14:57:19
In reply to Maybe TMI from T?, posted by pegasus on December 14, 2011, at 12:11:20
I have two thoughts.
One is that you were experiencing all the physical symptoms of shock - which given your injured state makes sense - you had less defenses against the pictures your brain produced.But my other thought, and this could just be me, is that his event created a real role reversal for you and you really weren't prepared for that. Just like a child can get overwhelmed when a parent gives out too much information, your therapist did that with you, although by no means on purpose. Most of the time when you reveal something awful about yourself, he is prepared to help you handle it - he offers mutual regulation to process the memory. By exploring his own memory, without his support to process it, you were left in a position that felt frightening - so your brain shut off. Because what was the correct response? How were you suppose to help him? He isn't going to allow you to comfort him, at least not much, nor is this your usual position with him.
IMO, he should have had better judgement than to share something so potentially fraught with peril. But it also might be a good time to look at your expectations of yourself and what you think people want/need from you - Is your fall back response to take it on, as if you have to make the other person not feel the pain of an event?
I'm sorry you were so rattled. Weird stuff gets us in weird ways. My therapist just got a new car. He didn't tell me but I know it is his because I see him in two different offices - same new car in both places - not a coincidence. It throws me when I see his "real" life in such a concrete way - in which I'm no part of. And yet I don't really get my reaction to it all.
Will you tell him about your reaction? I imagine that would be hard.
poster:Daisym
thread:1004940
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20111017/msgs/1004946.html