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Re: How do you speak your own voice? » annabelle smith

Posted by Dinah on April 30, 2011, at 21:32:35

In reply to How do you speak your own voice?, posted by annabelle smith on April 30, 2011, at 18:32:02

The problem with using suicidal gestures is that people don't hear the message you're trying to send. They hear something different entirely.

It's far better to use your words.

If you say you feel this way, I believe that you feel this way.

I also believe you when you say this isn't about depression. But I hope you hear me when I say that medications aren't only about depression either. A decent psychiatrist wouldn't actually try to treat you for a depression you don't have.

Pragmatically speaking, what do you think would happen if you acted out in the way you describe? Do you think they'll feel compassion or do you think they'll feel anger? Do you think this will draw you closer to others? Maybe you could ask others here how attempts to communicate by acting out actually works in real life.

Are you getting what you want from your current method of seeking care and attention? Are there more effective ways to achieve your goals?

I totally understand the impulse. I have been in the place where I acted out my feelings, where I tried to communicate with self harm. I tell you that no one *ever* heard the message that I was trying to convey that way. They heard something entirely different. They felt something entirely different than what I wanted them to feel. I did not get what I wanted by doing the things I did.

And I say that from the standpoint of someone who has now achieved their goals in this area. But not by those means.

There's nothing wrong with trying to get the care you need from others. But is what you describe the most effective way to get it?

If you think you're in any danger of acting on your thoughts, Babble can not be sufficient help. Please call your therapist.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:984180
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20110324/msgs/984225.html