Posted by Honore on September 3, 2007, at 9:07:34
In reply to Re: Apology **possibly triggering** » gardenergirl, posted by RealMe on September 3, 2007, at 3:54:50
I guess we all go through periods when we feel too drained or overwhelmed, or hurt, or exhausted, physically or mentally. We expect a lot of ourselves-- we want our responses to say something real, to give something to ourselves and the other person. I know I do.
It's important to me not to say something insensitive or off-key, something that hits a nerve, or is just what the person doesn't want to hear.
Sometimes, I don't feel up to that. I feel tired, or out of sorts, or driven, or anxious, sometimes I can't sit still long enough and I don't like to say only a few words-- when it's a complicated thing.
So I don't say anything. Maybe that's wrong, and leaves the person feelings that no one cares, or has read, or is interested. It isn't that-- though-- it's all these other thing in my head, about not having enough or the right thing to give.
And I always welcome what people say-- whether they're upset, or have had some good news, or upsetting/good news, or have a problem, or an experience to tell. I welcome it-- just that they're here, and care enough to confide in me, among others--
But it's hard to communicate that at times. And at times, it's hard to communicate the things that bother me-- I hold that back, because I feel so badly about it.
There are so many things that keep us from being there (or here), but we do overcome them. I appreciate RealMe's writing what she did-- because it captures how I often feel, with many thoughts running through my head, not in circles, but leading me to a sense of quandry, that doesn't resolve itself and seems almost useless to share. I think-- no one can help me with this because it's pretty hopeless, and it's been going on for so long. And too I wonder, what's wrong with me? But I find no answer.
Honore
poster:Honore
thread:780329
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070822/msgs/780516.html