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Re: My head is so full of thoughts I can't sleep

Posted by daisym on April 28, 2006, at 16:02:10

In reply to Re: My head is so full of thoughts I can't sleep » happyflower, posted by orchid on April 28, 2006, at 14:27:57

Nothing hurts as much as unrequited love...out and out rejection might even be easier because being cared for in this capacity just keeps highlighting what we are missing.

...and that is the whole point, isn't it? I think Orchid is right -- you feel so unloved and uncared for. And you probably aren't getting the love and care you need. Part of what therapy has done for me is allowed me to begin to think that maybe, just maybe, it would be OK for me to like being cared about and taken care of -- at least just a little.

But the whole process is amazingly painful, isn't it?

It really helps me to write stuff down when I'm thinking about so much. I actually write directly to my therapist. When he was on vacation, my homework was to write to him everyday and tell him what was happening. I gave him something like 17 pages to read and he seemed really glad to have it all. It filled in a number of gaps and we also have some stuff kind of stuck over "there" to deal with later. Mostly I was really honest about how much I missed him. He really does understand what that need is about and how it gets mixed up with wanting to be cared for, wanting to be protected and wanting to be special.

Hang tough. You are really doing good work.
lv and hugs,
Daisy

 

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