Posted by JLx on September 6, 2007, at 20:20:36
In reply to Re: Self-esteem and FAT » JLx, posted by ClearSkies on September 6, 2007, at 7:04:01
> > So we have to do it. We absolutely need to internalize that we are okay and worthy of the best in life ourselves even if fat.
> >
>
> Yikes. I just can't get past this. I've put on weight with the Remeron I'm on - inevitable, and uncomfortable. I don't *feel* very healthy like this.Feeling physically uncomfortable or that we're not as healthy as we'd like is one thing and internalizing fat shame messages is another, imo. If someone beloved to you gained as much weight as you have would that alter your estimation of them? Would they become less okay? Would you no longer wish the best that life has to offer for them? I'm guessing not. Yet that is the societal message we get when fat: that we're wrong, that we don't deserve the gifts of life, as if we should be punished.
It's been years since I read it, but I try to at least recall the title from time to time, "How To Be Your Own Best Friend" and consider myself if I were being a best friend to me.
And I know from long experience that the more I hate myself, my "as is" state of fat, the less I will actually do something about it because shame and shoulds are just not motivating. Negative thoughts do not result in positive action.
> I'm trying to deal with the self esteem issues that are cropping up by doing some yoga, which I had dropped this summer. So far I've gotten as far as dragging my mat out of the closet and following along on a TV broadcast. I'm working up to getting back to joining a yoga studio, but I want to walk in there with my self acceptance strong and intact. At the moment I'm not feeling the least bit secure about my steadiness on my feet. Like my centre of balance has shifted too quickly. More yoga, more yoga.
>
> CSThat sounds like a pretty big step to me. I've been trying to motivate myself to do strength training -- I have the book and the weights -- but so far have not done so. I don't want to tell you just how LONG I've had the book and the weights! ;)
"When you're ready, you'll do it", my therapist used to say. And not a minute before ! :)
Btw, what's the reason for weight gain from Remeron, do they know? A change in metabolism or something? I used to feel very sluggish on SSRIs, and all I wanted to eat was carbs and anything sugary.
JL
poster:JLx
thread:780987
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20070330/msgs/781248.html