Posted by Dinah on June 16, 2008, at 10:54:13
In reply to Suicide Clusters - Rule Addition Request, posted by AbbieNormal on June 12, 2008, at 19:25:10
I think it is definitely two issues.
Memorializing Slinky isn't to my mind a bad thing. Slinky was a member of the community for a long time and no matter how she died some of us will feel the need to commemorate her life. It matters, of course, how she died. It hurts me to think of her hurting so much. But no matter how she died, I'd want to remember her.
It's easy to think that we're all competent adults who understand these things. And certainly those of us posting on this thread are. But this is open to anyone. Adult, teen, whatever. People with issues that dovetail with this topic. This is the internet. You can't get anymore public than this. I realize that there are people who will take that to mean that suicide is a way to get people to remember you or to care about you or to hurt those who loved you. And I wish there was a polite way to say it isn't how Slinky died that made us love her. It was how she lived. That if you want people to care, the way to do it is to reach out to people, and to live a life that touches others. Just killing yourself is not the way to go about it. The result might well be far different from what a person imagines, even if they could somehow stay alive to see it.
I do think there is a danger on a board like Babble in making suicide seem like a legitimate and viable option. Yes, we can try to make distinctions. But those distinctions can be lost in the midst of depressive thinking. There are times when I would have grasped at anything positive said about suicide as a way of justifying the action. It seems as serious, if not more serious, an action as talking about suicide or death lightly or jokingly.
However, I can also see problems in enforcement. A person who is thinking of killing themselves would of course see it as a beneficial thing to others as well as themselves. That's part of the whole seductive power of the depressive thinking. And like some other things on Babble that are currently against the rules, I think maybe those things are best countered by other posters rather than enforced. I'd hate to sanction someone who is truly believing those things as they say them. Yet I'd also hate to see people who may be in a vulnerable state of mind be influenced by the positive things that might be said about suicide on board. And we might say that no one is that vulnerable, but I think there are times when I might have been. So I extend my own experience to think that others might be as well.
I don't know. On the one hand, there is the argument that this is best dealt with by other posters. On the other hand, I can see times when it would be more in keeping with the stated purposes of the board to keep a stance against suicide as a positive choice. And as a deputy, I can see the benefit of having the structure in place to be used if necessary, while not being forced to use it often or in every case. While Dr. Bob prefers globally applicable rules. And I can see his point of view since fairness has always been a major concern on Babble.
poster:Dinah
thread:834368
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20080424/msgs/834876.html