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Re: finally... » cloudydaze

Posted by gardenergirl on July 28, 2006, at 20:01:46

In reply to Re: finally..., posted by cloudydaze on July 28, 2006, at 15:45:52

> > If someone IRL feels justifiably angry about something, and you can understand and relate to their anger, does that mean you should excuse or overlook a problematic behavior related to the anger? What if they do something such as breaking a valued object, hitting someone, or yelling obscenities and insults to someone? Does that go unremarked because you can understand their anger or even if not, because you can see they are "in a state"?
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> ****People "get out of" crimes all the time because of "insanity". The legal system writes them off as not being accontable for their mistakes. I am accountable for my actions, more so than a lot of adults much older than me, but I shouldn't be accountable for someone elses feelings IF I DON'T INTEND TO CAUSE THEM. The rules of this board *seem* to say that *I* should be held accountable for how someone else feels.

You're not accountable for other's feelings. In the case I write about above, I asked about accountability for the *behaviors* associated with the anger, not the *feeling* of anger. Should a behavior such as shouting obscenties or insults at someone be considered acceptable behavior? Isn't this behavior separate from how anyone might respond to it, either IRL or here on the board? Maybe not a single person queried would feel offended. Does that make it an acceptable behavior?

That's what I'm asking. I can't argue or judge anyone's feelings. They are not mine to assess. But behavior is separate from feelings. Related in many cases. But a separate construct.
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> ***Obviously, we have conflicting views.
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On that we do agree. :)

gg

 

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