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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Jost on July 31, 2006, at 23:00:39
I wish I could think of something I'd like to work on (ie study, research, write about).
That's something I used to find meaningful, although I tended to pick whatever was hardest thing to do--not figuring out what I personally was drawn to, more than any other thing, what interested me enough to invest time, energy, thought in. What, if anything, spoke to me.
I think I thought that if no one had understood something, and it was considered very difficult, I would contribute something, if I understood it. That took the place of finding anything per se worthwhile.
I don't know. I think about various things, and either I don't know enough about them to do anything much, or they don't seem worthwhile. Or both.
I can't quite get my mind around the idea that it's worth starting something from the ground, even if I could decide on what to start. I mean I could start something, but it takes forever to get really educated on anything--
I wish something would suddenly magically be endowed with meaning, so I could organize myself around it-- other than my work that I already do, which is meaningful, but until my shoulder gets a lot better, which may never happen, I can't do it that much. Plus it's so non-intellectual, and it feels like something's missing. But it would be better if I could do it more, I guess.
Sigh.
Well, I'll look at this sometime in the future maybe, and things will have changed. I hope.
Jost
Posted by Racer on August 2, 2006, at 22:11:56
In reply to What's worth working on?, posted by Jost on July 31, 2006, at 23:00:39
Can you tell us/me anything about your general field? That might help...
As for the part about not ever really figuring out what you were drawn to, that's why I'm resolutely NOT saying that I'm working towards a degree. In fact, I deny that I am, even though I would like to be.
Instead, I'm saying that I'm browsing the buffet, taking whatever seems interesting at the moment, and seeing if I enjoy it. So far, I've only taken a few classes, but I'm already glad that I'm doing it. Way back when, I enjoyed algebra, but never took anything beyond what I needed to take Stats, which I'd need for a degree... Now, though, I can take algebra, and more algebra, and so on, AND I can still take stats. Maybe, somewhere along the way, I'll learn that I am really drawn towards something.
And maybe not.
I hope that I'll enjoy what I learn along the way, though...
Take care.
Posted by Jost on August 4, 2006, at 4:02:58
In reply to Re: What's worth working on?, posted by Racer on August 2, 2006, at 22:11:56
Thanks for showing interest, Racer. I'll write more about it tomorrow.
Give it thought over night. There is a field that I could go back to-- if I found something there, other than what I felt before--
I've been thinking about whether there are different feelings I could use, in different areas, which would make it something new. (I'm up at 5 am, reading, for some reason.)
Jost
Posted by Racer on August 4, 2006, at 22:48:12
In reply to Re: What's worth working on? » Racer, posted by Jost on August 4, 2006, at 4:02:58
Posted by Jost on August 6, 2006, at 23:20:54
In reply to I want to learn more about this... (nm) » Jost, posted by Racer on August 4, 2006, at 22:48:12
Sorry Racer, I must have written to you during an episode of middle of the night amnesia. I've had about three of them in the last few weeks, and it begins to make me very nervous. I've never had one before, except once, over a year ago.
I have no memory of being on this page since I posted the thread.
I'd believe that someone else wrote that, except that I was up around that time, and I was reading. And what I wrote, although it isn't in my style-- does sort of make sense to me. So I guess I wrote it.
Those parts of my life can be depressing; so, until I'm more hopeful...
Thanks a lot, though, for being interested. The whole subject comes up now, sometimes, and it almost seems there's something else to do-- sometimes--.
I never talk about the past, and it's very hard to think about when in the wrong frame of mind.
Hope your work is going well, and you've weathered that less than desired performance. I identify with your dissatisfaction, there-- although I'm a massive underachiever.
Much better to insist, inwardly, even too much, on great grades -- to believe you can and will get them, even if you worry--you're in the struggle.
Jost
This is the end of the thread.
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