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Re: schizophrenic is my new role in the community

Posted by Christ_empowered on February 4, 2015, at 9:53:06

In reply to Re: schizophrenic is my new role in the community, posted by SLS on February 4, 2015, at 9:00:53


I'm considering community service. Right now, I'm trying to (finally) finish my undergraduate degree online. I was able to transfer in about 70ish credits, so it shouldn't take too much time to get 'er done...

...I do need to do something. Question is...what? Years ago, in my early 20s, I tried to work at a small, local movie theater. I wasn't "good enough" or something, so my ex-shrinks told my co-workers all kindsa fun, Freudian stuff about me. I started getting fewer hours, had to cover for people more often, wasn't invited to after work get togethers, so finally...I quit.

This may sound weird, but I've been without a job for so long (thankfully, my parents are now semi-affluent and supportive...plus I've been getting disability for a few years now) that I'm: a) scared b) not sure I "fit in" the working world and c) a part of me views anything outside of my little world as an imposition. I know that's really self-centered, but...I've spent so much time alone these past several years, its crazy.

My neighbors are harsh towards me. This is a decent neighborhood in a small, southern town. This chunk of town is mostly lower-middle to middle-middle class...then there's my parents' house, lol. Old, pre-civil war house. So, back in the day, these neighbors would call me "poor wh*t* tr*sh" and such, and now I'm living with my people, I have a decent car, so on and so forth, and...so...

...they yell out stuff like, "You're nothing special!" and "Queer!" and "You're just a factory worker!" and "quit trying to be something special!" and "know your place!"

So on and so forth. I'm apparently "uppity."

Ugh. Sorry to vent. :-)


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