Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on December 31, 2009, at 20:32:01
The other day seemed like 1999, because you just don't notice time then when it bites you..it's nostagic. My brother was a big part of my life, and my mother. My grandmother I lost in 2008 but I knew that was coming...
You know...what If I could ask babble about advice my brother and me and relationship. Everything here is "has" to be anaymous, which means just what I post poster is what I post. Because if vital info is put out, it will be visable though google, askjeaves, so also to warn poster's do not post any names or anything that is connected with the real individuel.
We'll besides this and facebook, are my main things that I post. So, let's kinda of just talk, how do you know a relationship can last? because of choices? or by the REAL feeling you feel in a situation, like "I hate being in class, yet I act like I love it". What I saw in a brother relationship was just "pals" and more of a big brother sense of looking over, and being a mentor. One thing I've noticed about mentoring [off subject] sometimes people have much love in their words but their heart follow's other things, and it's not valid what they say. Even if they are in good social postion, mentoring doesnt mean there your friend...it's just someone to talk to, and ask their superiorty advice over stuff.
If someone reads this, please can you help me with connecting with my brother again? and also my family, what happened is I'm afriad of opinion's and then impending rejection because unacceptable behavior, and images or labels that where assumed..but they where not true. I honestly, just don't have good defenses when attacked and what I did was abused stimulants to improve mental activity. That really hit bad because I know that stimulants can increase emotion, good or bad, and increase the amount of stress on the brain, while being misused, it's like putting a car in 5th gear until it wear's down. I've matured I know that by just belief, that was an stupid time, and I will take it correctly, If the dose doesnt work, just stay with that dose, don't take what I think works.
My brother and me, we used to things together and had a good time, because there was a "connection" and I understood somethings, yet when time went on..I didnt understand things that where happening for the better for them [his family]. They took me to six flags, just good "mentor", but like a said, saying postive things to people doesnt mean there your friend, sometimes they could be your adversity, eventually. Much love can come out of someone's mouth which is flattery, and the real meaning to me is foretelling a stab in the back. What I have trouble with...I can't hold a stable relationship, because I withdrawl from some "social" things that are normal then a label is placed. What I just want is just knowing how to "have" normal life.
My family accepted me in the past because they loved me, but what caused some resentment was the choices that I made, and not telling the truth. I mean it..If you are known for not telling the truth, you going to have a image placed on you for a long time, until trust is placed back that you truely have changed through pain.
What I do avoid, I just sit and stay back because socaily I do have difficulties and I rather just be known as being "quiet" and "withheld" than "an active idiot", that's one image i do NOT want to have.
So anyone?
poster:rjlockhart04-08
thread:931903
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20091125/msgs/931903.html