Posted by inanimate peanut on December 24, 2009, at 18:32:56
Is anyone else obsessed with their meds? I swear it's all I think about 24/7. I was on Parnate 60mg and was pinning every shred of hope I had in this life to increasing the Parnate and adding Nortriptyline. My doc said no to both of those yesterday and it killed me. I've been trying to find Parnate online to buy to increase it myself with little luck. I think I may have found a way to do it myself anyway. I can also buy the nortriptyline online and do that myself to. But, that is not the point. The point is that I am OBSESSED about it. I spend all of my time posting on the med boards with questions about it, thinking about what my next steps should be. My doctor saying no crushed my world because I had all my hopes pinned on those meds. It's just that I have tried so many meds in the past and have so few options left that I'm just clinging to it so hard. I don't want to be depressed like this forever and I'm scared that if these meds don't work I will be and I'll never get any better! It's almost like I think if I keep looking at the message boards that I have some control over whether the meds will work, although I know at a logical level that's not true. I need to get stuff done to prepare for Christmas and I just can't make myself leave. I thought maybe writing it out and seeing how ridiculous it all is would help. I guess we'll see.
poster:inanimate peanut
thread:930756
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20091125/msgs/930756.html