Posted by daveuk08 on August 27, 2008, at 10:07:14
Subject: The Parrot
>
> A man is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
>perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Golly, I
>wonder what happened to this parrot?"
> The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."
> "Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered
>me!"
> "I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly
>intelligent, thoroughly educated bird "
> "Oh yeah?" the man asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto
>your
>perch without any feet?"
> "Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you
>asked,
>I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see
>it
>because of my feathers."
> "Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English
>can't
>you?"
> "Actually, I speak both Spanish and
English, and I can converse with
>reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports,
>physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought
>to
>buy me. I'd be a great companion."
> The man looks at the $200.00 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't
>afford
>that."
> "Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
>wants me 'cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20,
>just make the guy an offer!"
> The man offers $20 and walks out with the parrot. Weeks go by. The
>parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he
>s a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's
>insightful. The man is delighted.
> One day the man comes home from work and the parrot goes,
>Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I
>should tell you this or
not, but it's about your wife and the postman."
> "What are you talking about?" asks the man.
> "When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at
>the
>door in a sheer black nightie."
> "WHAT???" the guy says incredulously. "THEN what happened?"
> "Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie
>and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.
> "NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"
> "Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees
>and began to kiss her all over...."
> Then the frantic man screams, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"
> "Damned if I know. I got an erection and fell off my perch!"
>
> Now, if this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a really bad day.
poster:daveuk08
thread:848577
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080816/msgs/848577.html