Posted by dreamboat_annie on November 8, 2006, at 18:12:20
In reply to Maybe » dreamboat_annie, posted by Declan on November 8, 2006, at 3:56:43
I'm not usually an envious person, although I do have my moments :-) And, I had wondered if it was projection, but the feeling is different I think. It's more like when I look at people going about their day, I start thinking about the age-old, unanswerable question - what is it all about, what's our purpose in life? I wonder about a person's struggles and how hard it can be for some, maybe all. I think we would all like to believe that we have make some kind of a difference, even if it is just in one person's life, but sometimes it seems like people are just sad or disillusioned and beaten down by life and all the twists and turns - especially when you catch them unaware. It seems like everybody is trying to be successful (oh yeah, and, how do you measure success?), achieve happiness and contentment, be social and be accepted . . . And, yet . . . I think about how disconnected we all are (over-generalization, I know) and how we go through life in our own little worlds, only getting close to a select few and being satisfied with that. Walking down the street, or standing in an elevator or sitting on the bus and being reluctant or uncomfortable or both to make eye contact with strangers. I don't know. I feel such a sense of emptiness (not even sure if that is the feeling) sometimes, not for myself though, when I start thinking about how we get up each day and try to make something out of our lives. How we try to deal with the demons of the past while trying to hold the demons of the future at bay, all the while trying to feel like we belong, we matter and our lives have some meaning. I know I'm not making sense. It's hard to articulate the emotions. Oh well, I got that off my chest. Sorry this was so long.
> I do. I often wonder if it's envy, although envy leads to destruction, so that doesn't seem quite right, or amazement at my seperateness, about the fact of this person in front of me, or maybe (as I get older) a sense of wonder at the beauty (and fragility) of younger people. But yes, like emptiness. This hasn't got anything to do with projective identification, has it?
>
> But maybe it's not so odd. We take our existence for granted much of the time.
poster:dreamboat_annie
thread:700738
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20061106/msgs/701728.html