Posted by TexasChic on June 9, 2006, at 19:06:05
Cuteboy broke my heart.
I knew he was acting standoffish this week, I thought it was because I was refraining from initiating conversation. So I tried talking to him. Still standoffish. Yesterday I asked him if he would at least say goodbye this time on his last day before he went on layoff (he didn't last time to anybody, he just walked out). I told him it would probably be the last time we saw each other because I didn't plan on coming back. I told him about the interviews I've had at two places, and the one I have at another next week.
Then today he went to lunch with the bitchygirls, and when they came back he wasn't with them. I started crying because I knew he was gone and planned it that way (I had noticed how clean his desk was when he went to lunch, and suspected what had happened). Then the bitchygirls saw me crying and gawked and stared at me. They laughed and said, "She didn't know!" Then they proceed to walk around and talk about him as much as possible. I swear I'm not exaggerating, more people than me witnessed it. Me and the guy in front of me that I have confided in actually started laughing because they were so ridiculously transparent! They kept making any excuse to be near me and him so they could hear us talk. I started mimicking them saying, "Ooh, I need to go to Joanna's desk (close to us), and "Why, I need to go to Joanna's desk too!" And then, "Oh, we've got to look through this magazine, at Joanna's desk of course!"(this was after they left the first time and then came back). Then one said, "Hey bitchygirl, come read the review 'cuteboy wrote about this movie!" (something we do). That was when the guy in front of me was like, "OMG, I just don't believe that . I mean I really don't believe that!"
I finally got fed up. Some of us were getting together after work (something I planned), and with an hour to go, I wanted to leave so bad, but I didn't want to let them win. I instead asked the boss how soon I could go on layoff if I volunteered. I told him the people were just too mean there and I couldn't take it much longer. He told me at least two more weeks and asked me to at least consider it over the weekend. I said okay.
I went back to my desk. I then realized I really wanted to leave and have some time to myself before we all got together, and I wasn't doing what I wanted because of THEM (which was directly opposite of what I was trying to do!). So I told the guy in front of me to tell everyone I would meet them there, and went to the boss and said, "I need to go". He just said, "Okay". I was shocked. I really expected him to try to talk me out of it. (I found out later he had been asking about me and what was wrong). Leaving would mean I would get written up for attendance for the third time, and on the forth time you're fired. I knew he was aware of my attendance situation because we had discussed it, so hence the surprise.
I went to the restaurant and ordered a beer and ate some tortilla chips. I went to put salt on the chips, but somehow hit the edge of the bowl, throwing tortilla chips up in the air all over the place (like a catapult)! They went in my beer, on the counter, the floor, my hair, everywhere. There was just the bartender and one customer there and he (the customer) said, "How much beer have you HAD?" I said, "about three sips." I had to laugh, it was just so funny and typical me. I just can't explain how funny it was for all those chips to go flying through the air.
When everyone got there I told them I had already managed to do something clumsy. I described it to them and we laughed our *sses off. We ended up having a really good time. It was all people who want nothing to do with the bitchy crowd and pretty much stay to themselves. They all thought the bitchygirl's behaviour was un-f*cking-believable. So after a while, I actually began to feel better. I'm still hurt and pissed, and I'm definitely through with cuteboy, but I've been trying to move on for a while now, so maybe now I can.
So now I get drunk. Is that a trigger? I'm sorry Lar, I know this is the thorn in your side, but I really don't understand triggers. I mean I REALLY DON”T understand how to know something is a trigger. I just didn’t want to say anything before.
-T
poster:TexasChic
thread:654983
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060604/msgs/654983.html