Posted by Tamar on March 30, 2006, at 7:24:34
In reply to The scarf, posted by Deneb on March 30, 2006, at 0:05:21
Hi Deneb,
I think perhaps I may have replied to your question about the scarf without having seen that Dr Bob had already said somethnig about it. I can't remember exactly what he said, but I'm pretty sure I hadn't seen it when I replied to you. Sorry if I caused confusion.
> I put a lot of love into it. Maybe he can give it to his wife if he doesn't want it. The love shouldn't be wasted.
Your love for Dr Bob will never be wasted. The scarf may be a symbol of your love, and something which you invest with a great deal of importance. And that's very understandable.
But it sounds to me as if you think of him declining the scarf and imagine that he's also rejecting your love for him. And perhaps that’s where the scarf symbolism isn't as helpful as it could be. After all, if he really did accept it and then disposed of it without your knowledge, then that would be an actual rejection of your love. But if he declined to accept it while still indicating that he values you and your feelings, perhaps that’s better. Perhaps it would indicate that your love is important to him without needing to be symbolised in a scarf. After all, scarves wear out but love lasts and lasts. You don’t need to prove you love him by giving him something; it’s enough that you love him, and I’m pretty sure he won’t reject your feelings of love.
Just my two cents,
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:626334
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060324/msgs/626478.html