Posted by Deneb on December 16, 2005, at 21:13:36
In reply to Re: Ideals » Deneb, posted by alexandra_k2 on December 16, 2005, at 19:31:09
> > I hope I'm not hurting or scaring anyone.
>
> i think you are okay. and you know that people aren't afraid to tell you if they feel hurt or scaired in response - right?That's good to know. I want to learn to accept constructive criticism.
> i think he probably doesn't freak out as much as other people tend to at times...
I don't think he can afford to freak out. It would lead to a breakdown I think. Suicide threats for example, they happen often here. What would happen to Dr. Bob if he worried about them? He'll probably go insane. He probably learned to accept that certain people will die and there is nothing one can do.
> good to remember he is a person who has feelings (in terms of saying things that are likely to hurt)
I will try to remember that but it is difficult to imagine him as someone other than the ideal.
> i think you will probably find...
> that he will be just as elusive / enigmatic / aloof / reserved (insert appropriate word) when you meet irl...I think he will be quiet like me. I think he will make some light small talk and not get into anything personal.
>... but yeah, i guess it is important to try and remember that it does tend to be a response to the past rather than the present situation. and try and remember that he is a person who has feelings.
The weirdest thing...my past isn't all that horrible, at least compared to other people's pasts. I wonder where my tantrums come from?
> i guess thats where you think about what kinds of things there is evidence for.
> we know people do go off at him rather at times...
> and i've never seen him lash out or post out of hurt or hostility or frustration or anything like that.
> but he is a person and i'm sure he feels those things at times.
> maybe he is fairly rock solid irl too...
> or maybe... the boards bring out the best in him because he has more time to compose himself before responding...
>
> i think he probably is fairly rock solid irl...
> because it can be jolly hard to compose yourself even on the boards.
> but he's probably not quite so solid as he appears on the boards...
> because he is playing moderator
> and
> because the medium is different.I think you are right, he has time to compose himself on the boards. I'll just have to catch him off guard when I meet him in person. LOL Just kidding. I wonder if he gets tired of playing moderator all the time? Maybe sometimes he wants to join in on the conversation. I wish we could support him too.
> i really try very hard to try and be realistic and not to idealise him too much.
> because...
> in my experience that tends to lead to rage that is more about the past than about the present.I like to think about Dr. Bob. I don't like to be realistic. I don't expect anything from him, I have all I need from him using my imagination. I don't think I'll be disappointed.
> i dunno.
> i'm a lot messed up in some respects...Me too. :-)
Deneb
poster:Deneb
thread:589622
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20051215/msgs/589686.html