Posted by partlycloudy on January 1, 2005, at 6:20:47
In reply to partlycloudy...how are you?, posted by antigua on December 31, 2004, at 14:08:00
Well, hello to you! Work has been OK. I get really tired by the end of the day, but it has been so quiet with the holidays that this re-entry couldn't have been easier. The v.p. on whom I hung up has been pretty curt with me, but it turns out he has a stress-related back injury. (I didn't do it! Honest.) I've been polite and friendly in my partlycloudy way with him, and that savage beast seems to be soothed so far.
I do find that I have no interest in sharing my experiences during my leave with anyone I work with. It seems that some people are curious, but not pushy about it. Who wants to hear how depressed you've been, anyhow? Not many, outside of Babble.
My meds are in a good place right now: Cymbalta 60mg at night, 25mg Trazodone at night, Lo-Ovral and a patch for my fussy hormones. No more Ambien, and Xanax only as needed. I made it through Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years unscathed, sober, content.
I see my new T on Monday. I was sick with a cold so I couldn't make our last appointment, and then she was on holiday, so it will have been about 3 weeks since we've talked. I'm not scared of the journey with her as much as I'm anxious to start in earnest and discover what I'll learn from her. My depression is *not* a dim memory, nor is my panic. I have had a few not-so-good days, but they don't make me think I'm back on a downwards slide. The anxiety is proving to be the sticking point with me - so many fears, still so little confidence in myself and my capabilities. Being able to keep from drinking has been a big help.
I only made one resolution last New Year's, and that was to become a happier person. I cannot believe that I've been able to accomplish that, but I have. My hope is that this year I'll be able to become a stronger person; more insightful, more trusting of my instincts and able to act upon them.
Whew! Ask a simple question, and get a loaded, long winded answer.
Antigua, what's going on with you? I've been babble-shy lately, and I have not kept up with my pals here like I should.
poster:partlycloudy
thread:436037
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041226/msgs/436272.html