Posted by Larry Hoover on September 30, 2004, at 10:59:02
In reply to Re: Gossip, posted by Emme on September 30, 2004, at 10:14:35
> Negative gossip about you?? Now that's just nasty, not to mention bizarre. I'm sorry to hear about it. It's gotta be hurtful. I suspect the gossip will eventually go away. You'll still be here and you'll still be you and anyone saying unkind things will have spent energy uselessly and accomplished nothing.
>
> EmmeI'm replying to this post, but I'm really replying to everybody.
Thank you for the support. I really need/needed it, and it's much appreciated.
I chose to confront the gossipmonger, and I have had a reply. We shall see where that leads.
Gossip is not an innocent act. The gossiper is a hammer. The gossip is a nail. And the board into which the nail is driven is trust. You can pull the nail, after the fact, but the board will ever more have a hole in it.
Gossip permanently taints relationships. There are those who would say that truth must prevail. That's a rationalization for injurious behaviour. Those who believe in brutal honesty, I suspect, are motivated more by brutality than by honesty. And those who pursue this honesty, but linger in shadow, are perhaps representatives of that darker place.
That childhood saying about sticks and stones, which ends with "names will never hurt me" is false.
We can all do something about the propogation of gossip. If there is something you would say about me that you would not say to me.....you have found gossip. Imagine I was listening to that which you might say. Apply this principle to all that you utter. What if X heard these words?
There is innocent gossip, certainly. And we all do it, talk about others who are not present. Please, gossip cannot be undone. Gossip can be like perfume, or the stink of gasoline. Get a little on you....a little bit goes a long way. It clings. The tiniest remnant comes back.
Lar
poster:Larry Hoover
thread:396869
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040923/msgs/397241.html