Posted by partlycloudy on August 25, 2004, at 7:04:02
In reply to need to rant, posted by JenStar on August 25, 2004, at 1:32:29
This is the *perfect* place to rant. I had to read your post through a couple of times because you're having the exact experience I had - 20 years ago.
My husband was terrifically supportive, an over-worker, and didn't handle his job stress well at all. I was fearful rather than angry - I would kind of hide in the house until his latest work crisis had passed, because I knew if I interrupted him with anything, he would errupt.
When I had to work part time instead of full time, a friction developed. I felt guilty that I wasn't capable of toughing out a 40-hour work week. He felt that I wasn't contributing enough to the household. It didn't appear to be about the money, as I always underearned him by half; but it seemed to be a measure of my effort.
My response, though, is this: Jen, this is his problem. At a more peaceful work lull you might want to suggest that you get some counselling together. My husband was always resistant and refused any possibility that there might be something wrong with how he dealt with life's problems.
Also, I want to add that we divorced after 18 years of marriage. The work/stress issue contributed to, but wasn't responsible for, the breakup.
poster:partlycloudy
thread:381995
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040820/msgs/382028.html