Posted by Penny on January 16, 2004, at 11:16:38
In reply to Re: re being asked if suicidal, posted by Camille Dumont on January 16, 2004, at 10:54:41
> Thus, he asks if I'm suicidal. I reply yes. Then he always asks how as in what method / plan. Then I always say that i don't have one because I'm afraid thad admitting it will land me in the hospital against my will.
>
> I also find it sort of silly the whole "plan" question because yes I DO know how I would do it ... I've given some thoughts a long time ago and YES I've opted for a method but knowing how doesn't mean that I WILL do it now or whenever. I just can't "remove" that knowledge from my head ... unfortunately.
>
> Its hard to be honest with someone who can take actions againts your will ... even if you want the help.You are right - admitting you have a plan will probably mean a trip to the hospital - but a couple of things:
First of all, that's not necessarily a bad thing. It depends on the hospital, but some of them are quite helpful. And you could opt (if you're in the US, tho' I don't know about elsewhere) to go in voluntarily and not be an involuntary admit. Which is less stressful. I went for my first hospital stay last summer, and my pdoc set it up before I went so I didn't have to go to the ER or anything, I just went in as a direct admit, and it was voluntary, etc. So...
Second, when my pdoc asks me if I have a *plan* he doesn't usually mean do I have a method of choice. Yes, of course I do - I have thought long and hard about that for long enough, and he knows it. What he means is am I planning to do it at a specific time. The day I was admitted to the hospital, I had already written my note, in my journal, and I had a definite time. But I trust my pdoc, and I didn't really want to die, I just didn't want to hurt anymore, and I was honest with him, and he took care of me. Now I'm feeling much much better, since my meds have finally started working properly (after much trial and error!!!), and I'm thankful I was honest with him.
Perhaps, Camille, you could talk to your doc about options - is there a day treatment program you could go into? I had success with one of those in the past, though I'm sure others here could give you differing opinions.
My hospital stay was only a week. And I talked to my pdoc and my T almost everyday by phone, telling them everything that was going on. I wasn't too happy with my pdoc in the hospital, but I was able to assert myself enough that my med changes while there were minor and things I agreed with. And I guess, to be honest, if I had to go again, as much as I would hate it, I would probably go. I guess...
P
poster:Penny
thread:298988
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040109/msgs/301595.html