Posted by kara lynne on December 30, 2003, at 14:20:33
In reply to Re: Ex called my parents. » kara lynne, posted by fallsfall on December 29, 2003, at 8:59:45
You're right, he does not really accept that he had a role in the demise of the relationship. So can you give me an idea of the magnitude of change he would need after your therapy session? I'm just interested because it's so easy to start becoming seduced by the narcissist. In reality I know that he will never make those changes.
I do feel like this put me back. I was really feeling like I did the right thing--I meant what I said about that moment of clarity where I wondered why I hadn't left him YEARS ago.
But what is it that happens in these relationships--where women like Racer and me stay with these ar**s for so long, we finally leave and they change? I don't get it. I really don't. So I kept him from becoming better? Or the power struggle was more important to him than me? Why now does he call and let me know (indirectly) that he is taking better care of himself, telling my mother he's in a house he thought I'd like, and not staying out until 5am most nights? Is it a nya nya kind of thing? Because nowhere does he say, 'and now I'd like to share it with kara.' Or DOES he? In the most passive way, I guess. He says to my parents that I won't give him my address or phone number. Well he has my cell phone number and my email address. True I told him not to contact me anymore, but that was after his last email saying he wished he could give me 'one last hug'--he never tried! That's what always crushed me. And now he's all fixed, and so sorry that I am unevolved and angry, so I tell him not to post to me. But I'm really starting to feel crazy again. He did not email me and tell me how he wanted to be back with me. He told me he loved me and missed me and thought that maybe we could fiind someone to go into intensive psychoanalysis with.
I'm winding right back into the muck here. Hellllppp!!
thank you (((((fallsfalll)))))
poster:kara lynne
thread:294220
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031229/msgs/294716.html