Posted by Jai Narayan on December 21, 2003, at 10:59:45
In reply to Re: Rampant miscommunication? » tabitha, posted by Larry Hoover on December 21, 2003, at 8:36:15
>>When I offered up my theory of mixed messages, it may have seemed like I was "blaming" you, but it was an extension of the assumption you were seeking insight. You can't change me, for my part in miscommunication. My comments were about you because that is the only place YOU have power. Absolute power, in fact. I was not labelling you. I thought you were asking, in so many words, "Where might I look?".
<<Remember this quote? Lar you said this in Nov during communication with me about honesty: you said:
***" There is one exception. There are those who say they will speak with brutal honesty,………I just wanted to make a point that honesty should also include honest feelings, e.g. respect and empathy."***
<<You are not being brutal but you are not following your own rules:
***Larry wrote:
"I just wanted to make a point that honesty should also include honest feelings, e.g. respect and empathy."IMHO you may have wanted to fix the problem ***"Where might I look?"***
(give her your analysis) and that's where you were coming from while it appears she wanted to be heard and get some empathy. It's a common problem with communication styles…I often ask for emotional support not a **fix it** response.
Lar, your pearls of wisdom are greatly appreciated if I ask for them. I have learned a lot from you and am open to your reflection but only when I ask for it. Then I'm ready to learn...
I hope this can be resolved.
peace & love to you both
poster:Jai Narayan
thread:291123
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031217/msgs/292108.html