Posted by galkeepinon on October 27, 2003, at 0:00:16
In reply to Re: Would Anyone be willing to help me please. » galkeepinon, posted by memma on October 26, 2003, at 21:00:27
Elle, Dinah, jyl, Michael, memma, thank you all so much for your support. I really need it right now. As I write this I am crying, I wish you could see, but you don't need to, I guess I feel like I have to prove myself. Stupid I know.
I guess it's just one of those nights. I just got finished watching that show Cold Case, and for some reason, it got to me because it was a show about a little girl's past and confronting it. I know I need to do that and someday soon I hope to, unless these tears are part of it I don't know.
~Elle, thanks, I'm trying not to panic and will make an appointment with my doctor first thing Monday, I have to, because I found 2 lumps tonight while taking a bath (which I haven't done in a long time), she can hopefully check the moles also. I tend to have *large* boobs, which isn't always a good thing, and they have been really sore lately and I just finished my period about 2 weeks ago. Anyway, from what I know my insurance won't cover mammograms for people under 40. I will talk to my doctor about it though. Thanks for your kind words Re: weight and how I seem like a wonderful person and all, but I have made my mistakes obviously, and I still hurt about the consequences, especially here, but I'll be ok. Bless you too Elle and thank you.
~Dinah, like I said I'm going to call my pcp Monday and tell her what's going on with the sore, the moles and now the 2 lumps. I think I need to ask her to refer me to a dermatologist. I was tested for diabetes about a year ago (Fasting Glucose Test) and all was normal. I will start posting on the substance abuse board re: feelings about food and weight, etc.. That's great you lost 15 pounds recently, but I'm sorry to hear that the glucophage made you sick:( I wish I could go off the meds, I know they have contributed to my weight gain, but I need them.
My mother and I are going into see my therapist Tuesday and I have no idea what is going to happen. Either I'll get up and run, or come home and I and my mother's relationshhip will never be the same. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I think that's neat about your grandma and grandpa~true meaning of love. Some guys just go for the size 7 woman, especially in California, and I guess some don't, Todd is one of them. I know there's so much more to what a person looks like, I understand what you're saying. I am happy you had a grandmother that had the most loving and giving and kind soul you could imagine, I really didn't and now I'm dealing with my feelings because my greandmother is failing fast (she's 90). I can't help but feel your love towards someone that is. You were blessed.
Dinah, thank you very much for your post, it means a lot.
~Michael, you're never crossing the line with me, it's ok. Tears again-cleansing ones so no worries. Thanks for that site, I matched 2 of the pictures, and yes, you are 100% right, it is VERY hard for me to accept that people care about me, I push them away sometimes and just have fear of getting close and getting hurt. I hear what you're saying Re:Todd, I think only time will tell for now.
~memma, haven't met you yet, but no matter, thank you for your post. I'm sorry I'm going through it too. I hope that you are well now after having a lump removed last year, and I'm glad it wasn't cancerous you're young:) Take care of you ok:)Like I said I think I need to see a dermatologist, it's time. I always think 'oh no it won't happen to me' but it can and it does, and it is.
Yes, your post helped a lot~thank you.
~And last but not least jyl, thank you. I think I'm really lucky right now to have the healthcare I do. I would be dead if I didn't have it. I'm not sure what my doc is going to suggest, all I can do is call her, and go in and see her.
Sorry about your bruising experience with the mammogram, ouch I believe you! You're my age too. This weight thing just has to be put to rest with me and I just need to talk about it and get the help I need regarding feelings, parental past pressure, etc. I hear you. I know these eating disorders can be sad both ways. It takes a lot out of us. Thanks jyl for helping me to see the brighter side of things. Isn't there a song..."not getting what you want , but wanting what you've got"? I LOVE that song, I guess it's time for me to start living it, instead of just singing it.Sorry if I rambled, I meant every word I said and I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your replies very, very much. Thanks again to all of you, you will NEVER know how much it meant to have you all reply and give me your feedback and concern.
I need to go to bed now, it's been a tough one.
Bless you guys and I hope you have a great week:)
Goodnight...Kristen
poster:galkeepinon
thread:273556
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031020/msgs/273788.html