Posted by Kar on August 27, 2003, at 13:47:28
In reply to Re: Horse hockey!!! » Kar, posted by Penny on August 27, 2003, at 12:41:06
Penny- you think you are the one to blame because she has indirectly stealthily CAUSED you to feel that way. you aren't over-reacting. I don't really know you or your situation but i know that in my case, being prone to depression, i tend to feel guilty and responsible for things going wrong in relationships. And I'm insecure. SOund like that might be what's up with you?
>I am so tired of her not taking responsibility for any of this.
You said it all right here. She's not taking responsibility. This means that she is, of course, in part at least (ok mostly!) to blame and her behsavior is unacceptable. And you know that. I don't hink it's aboput blame anymore. it's about whether you want to put this much effort into a relationship that seems to cause you to be hurt, mad, guilty and insecure. I might be projecting but it's what happened with me. My friend and I had been buddies for 5 years.>impossible to have an adult relationship with her
You said it.> everything resorts to drama.
Same with my friend>She complains about all the drama in her life.
sameDrama with her other friends.
same
all the same.>guilty around her and hurt
Well that ain't the way a true friend should act. Ever.>She knows I can't pay $1000/month on what I make, and she uses that against me.
Power trip. She's probably insecure and needs to feel like she can control you- sounds like she's doing a fine job of picking your weak(er) points. These types can sniff us out like those german shepards wearching for narcotics. oh that was a nice metaphor!
It makes me dependent on her.
I don't know what to say about this part- and crud- i can't read the rest of your letter...
I'll talk to you soon? hope this helped
poster:Kar
thread:254661
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030818/msgs/254735.html