Posted by Ted on August 15, 2003, at 21:32:15
In reply to Re: How to prevent a man from turning into a child?, posted by Tabitha on August 15, 2003, at 12:37:41
> Hmmm, maybe by setting an example? If they want to learn they will. Or, sometimes you can gently point out typical conversation-blockers men use, like trying to fix the problem when all you want is validation for your feelings. I knew one male, who incidentally had a very well-developed feminine side, and I explained this idea to him, he asked what you say to validate feelings. I suggested he say something like 'that must be really painful'. And darn if he didn't pick it up and start saying things like that instead of trying to fix the problem!My wife had to teach me in this way.
>There must be a whole string of women out there
>benefiting from my training.:-)
>Then again, I knew another male who had the same
>habit, I tried the same thing, but his reaction
>was, well, men try to fix problems and women
>want their feelings validated, that's just the
>way it is, can't change it, why try? So you
>have to find a guy who WANTS to learn.And sometimes you have to find a woman who is willing to accept the world as it is and not as she wants it to be.
Face it, Tabbi, you are both correct. The reality is that men and women have to BOTH be sensitive to the other's differences and accept them. To change is good, but not to is not necessarily bad.
Ted
poster:Ted
thread:250497
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030808/msgs/251201.html