Posted by Susan J on August 11, 2003, at 14:35:40
Hi, my first original post here. Hoping someone could give me some advice. Been fighting major depression for over a year now. While I was going through therapy and trying to get myself back to normal, I became close friends with a man I work with. Short version: I thought he was really nice, deep, caring, compassionate, etc. We had expressed interest in dating, but he said he wasn't ready. Fine. We were just close friends. One night in April, I truly felt suicidal, and called him up for some moral support. All I needed was about 15 minutes of him telling me I was OK, things would work out, etc.
Not asking a lot from him, I thought, although it would have done so much for me.
He told me he didn't have time to talk to me because he was hooking up the surround sound on his stereo that evening....told me to talk to my therapist because that's what I pay her for...
I can't even describe the hurt and betrayal and disillusionment I felt.....Been angry for months about it, just finally settling down and getting over it, when he pops back up in my life again, apologizing left and right for what he had done, hoping we could be friends again.
Sent me off on a roller coaster again. I really don't want to feel this way again. I told him to stay away from me for good. But even if he heeds this, how do I stop from feeling so crappy?
I'm going to Canada for two weeks and wanted to be normal,stable, happy by then.....I feel totally derailed from that now.
I'm so tired of feeling bad.
poster:Susan J
thread:250069
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030808/msgs/250069.html