Posted by fallsfall on July 22, 2003, at 10:06:27
In reply to Re: Denial, posted by giget on July 22, 2003, at 9:55:12
My (ex)husband uses denial all the time as a coping mechanism. I call it "The Ostrich with his head in the sand coping style". When I left him, I told him 6 months before, that I wanted to leave. I don't think it was until a month before I left that he believed that I was actually leaving. If you deny it, then you don't have to deal with it. In my experience, people who deny don't understand that they are going to have to deal with it later anyway. It is so overwhelming that they can't see it.
If what the person is denying is going to really hurt them or someone else, then it might be appropriate to try to get them to see it. I think that there is usually a fear associated with the denial, so you may need to work the fear out before they will be able to grasp the problem.
Is it this person's responsibility to fix the problem they are denying (like a parent would be responsible for keeping their children safe)? Or are they an observer?
Good luck
poster:fallsfall
thread:244205
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030719/msgs/244216.html