Posted by wendy b. on January 26, 2003, at 21:15:06
In reply to My son is on ritalin, so now I'm a bad parent?, posted by jodie on January 26, 2003, at 19:54:30
You know in your heart of hearts you are right, Jodie. It's hard to pull back from the nutty parents and relatives, but you have to, for your own sake and for your son's. It sounds like you are doing everything just right, to me. And further, if you and your son's father *agree* on the way his illness should be managed, then you are fine. You are the only ones whose opinions matter. Everybody else can just kiss off (so to speak).
I know it's hard with overbearing relatives. Took me 10 years of therapy to be able to step up to my mother, stepfather, sister, etc., and tell them they were full of s___ when they pulled their stuff on me. I just had to keep telling myself: I am taking responsibility for my own behavior (therapy and meds), and they have to with theirs. And the other thing is: unless you *ask*, the other family members don't *get* to have an opinion. Learning how to tune them out and follow your own instincts about what is best for your son is hard to do, but you have to stay sane.
You don't mention a therapist - are you seeing one or have you in the past? They are quite useful for "reality checks," as I like to call them. They also usually have good strategies for coping with sticky family situations. Learning how to pull back and not care any more, or care less, even, is a useful skill...Good luck with this,
Wendy
poster:wendy b.
thread:35827
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030120/msgs/35832.html