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Merry Christmas

Posted by Robin David John on December 25, 2002, at 13:02:51

Here is a wee poem..please excuse if it offends anyone

Tae a Fert

Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie
Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie
Just as ye sit doon among yer kin
There sterts to stir an enormous wind

The neeps and tatties and mushy peas
Stert working like a gentle breeze
But soon the peddin wi the sauncie face
Will have ye blawin all ower the place

Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
A'bodys gonnae have tae pay
Even if ye try to stifle
It's like a bullet oot a rifle

Hawd yer bum tight tae the chair
Tae try and stop the leakin air
Shifty yersel cheek tae cheek
Prae tae god it doesnae reek

But aw yer efforts go asunder
Oot it comes like a clap a thunder
Ricochets aroon the room
Michty me, a sonic boom

God almighty it fairly reeks
Hope I havnae shit ma breeks
Tae the bog I better scurry
Aw, whit the hel, it's no ma worry!

A'bodys roon about me choking
Wan or two are nearly bokin
I'LL feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile

Wis him! I shout with accusing glower
Alas, too late, he's just keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare
A dinnae feel welcome any mair

Where e'er ye go let ye wind ga' free
Sounds like just the job for me
Whit a fus at Rabbie's perty
Ower the sake o' wan wee ferty.


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poster:Robin David John thread:33996
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20021218/msgs/33996.html