Posted by akc on December 6, 2001, at 0:28:26
I've threatened for days now -- and have carried through with the cutting. And got carried away, so I had to go to the ER. Real smart. However, it has provided the relief I was looking for tonight. Even though it is late, I am actually able to concentrate better on my work than I have all day.
The shame will come tomorrow. I've got group therapy, and will do the right thing and fess up. I will probably leave many voicemails with my therapists, and just be a total pain in the butt. And who knows what will come next. Outside of a few people, I am working hard to keep on that perfect mask -- not letting even my closest friends know much. I feel like a broken record -- always sick -- always having some crisis.
But you guys -- you are enough tangentially there -- well, I don't feel as guilty dumping here so often. Still some guilt, but not as much as if you were here in person.
Back to work -- my document has printed out.
Just had to let you know what I did.
akc
poster:akc
thread:15032
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011130/msgs/15032.html