Posted by AKC on July 28, 2001, at 8:18:43
In reply to Re: CHILDHOOD... » AKC, posted by Willow on July 27, 2001, at 22:37:17
> Nope, 34! The 18ish was referring to wishful thinking, my humble attempt at a joke.
>
> WillowI missed the 18ish joke -- I think that is because 18 is one year I don't want to revist -- left home (a good thing, but sad that it was the only choice I had), joined the army, only to self-destruct. Way back then, the lack of sleep caused me to enter a bad depression. Didn't recognize it for that, but I ended up confessing my "aberrant" sexuality 4 months into that, and they let me part ways. My aunt banned me from her life, because I moved into a house where some single men lived (I thought it would be much more a scandle if there had been single women!), I was working at McDonald's for minimum wage, I was alone. Then, shortly before my 19th birthday, what turned out to be in some ways the best thing and in some ways the worst thing happened -- I stumbled upon conservative, fundamentalistic Christianity. Now, for any of you whose beliefs are this way, I do not mean to judge your beliefs. But for me and my makeup (e.g., my sexuality), it was a very confusing and damaging mix that continued for over a decade and that has effects to this day -- effects the at are as strong as those of my dad's horrible abuse metted out on me as a child.
Wow -- all this because you were trying to be funny, Willow?
I am a tad sad today. Not depressed. The topamax keeps working on that. But my job is not going as I would want, and because the topamax is working, I am clear headed enough to continue to have all these insights, and one of my best friends shared some disturbing things about her officer manager's decision to leave employment (tied to a church thing) and so this morning I am just sad. And needing a shoulder to cry on. And my best friend is leaving for Minnesota to day. And another friend is already in Las Vegas. And this friend is at scuba lessons, and you know how it is --
Your resident hounddog.
(thanks for listening -- I may call again later.)
poster:AKC
thread:8045
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010726/msgs/8159.html