Posted by sleepygirl2 on March 14, 2014, at 20:36:54
In reply to Re: Support is what Dinah Seeks, posted by Dr. Bob on March 14, 2014, at 15:16:41
> > Dinah is utilizing Babble as a safe place to express her hurt and shock
> >
> > Twinleaf
>
> > Dinah has the right also to take care of herself-- which involves expressing and working with the complexity and painfulness of many of her reactions. ... she was also saying ... that it would be devastating for her that he needed suddenly to abandon her.
> >
> > She does have the right to be angry and hurt, and disappointed-- and even to reject the relationship for a time.
> >
> > We need to accept the complexity of her (and our) feelings, and the primal sense of abandonment that some people particularly feel devastating-- leaving only the loved person's absence.
> >
> > Willful
>
> Thanks, I found that a helpful way of seeing what's going on. Maybe the Support that Dinah Seeks, right now, anyway, is understanding and empathy, not what might feel like "excuses" for her T's behavior. I'm going to respond to an earlier post, but I'll start a different thread for that.
>
> BobSeriously, this is not a good time to rationalize things.
Dinah knows how to rationalize.
We're all dependent to some extent, of course we can see our t's as separate people, but we attach, so we feel attached. When anyone is important to you, and they disappear without explanation, you'll miss them dearly.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
poster:sleepygirl2
thread:1062006
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140310/msgs/1062526.html