Posted by twinleaf on September 28, 2007, at 16:47:12
I'm working along in therapy with my "new" (now not so new) therapist. He is always very calm and attentive, and is highly thought of in my city. But I wasn't really sure if he was a really good "fit" for me- until today.
T: "I notice that you are remembering more about previous sessions now than you did earlier" (After the painful rupture with the previous therapist, I had been dissociating quite a lot in sessions- because, I think- I was so afraid of being abandonned again by another therapist).
me: "yes- you're right- I'm not so terrified now"
T: "it's very hard for you to believe that I would want to work with you, isn't it?"
me: "yes- very hard"
T: "but I do want to."
I suddenly believed him! I could see in his eyes that he meant it, and began to feel so happy.
me: "I am remembering more, but I don't know if that even matters too much. There's something else happening here which is wonderful, but there aren't any words for it"
T: "yes, there is......a sort of knowing which we are sharing .I wish it weren't such a hit and miss matter for patients to find therapists with whom they are a really good "fit".
me: "we are, aren't we?"
T: "yes, we are."
Then, back to working. But from now on, I'll always know that I've finally found someone with whom I really "fit", and that there are these amazing, non-verbal forms of knowing and relating going on between us. It feels so healing to me, and because he has begun smiling. even laughing at times, as well as making more spontaneous comments, I feel that he, also, thinks the therapy is going as he hoped it would. It's so mysterious- it feels at times as if our unconscious minds are in contact- that his is helping mine grow and be different.
poster:twinleaf
thread:785775
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070916/msgs/785775.html