Posted by Dinah on August 18, 2006, at 9:07:34
In reply to Thanks Dinah!, posted by crazy teresa on August 16, 2006, at 12:00:23
I must confess I never tried to change his behavior per se. I just clarified my boundaries by stating what I would and would not listen to when I visited him, and by sticking to it. And I tried to leave, when I had to, with as much regret and love as I could muster.
I would also try to forestall a tantrum. If I saw he was getting close to threatening to kill the family, and I was feeling up to it, I'd talk to him about how frustrating it was to be dependent on others to do what he was always able to do himself. And how they invariably didn't do it when or how he would do it himself. It still let loose a salvo of anger. But at least it was about the thing he was really angry about.
poster:Dinah
thread:676696
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060808/msgs/677707.html