Posted by B2chica on May 25, 2006, at 10:37:47
In reply to Back to victimization..., posted by Racer on May 24, 2006, at 18:45:45
>>Actually being helpless, though? When my T was trying to tell me that I had been completely powerless, that someone else had victimized me while I was vulnerable, I tried that on and got sick. I nearly was sick in her office, it was so powerful.
the thought of this makes me sick as well.
this is a very hard thread to comment too. so much i understand. so much i feel similar to you. so much it hurts, so much denial, so much hate...to me.>> "Don't look at is as 'I was victimized,' but as 'someone did something bad TO ME.
-its taken me a while to even say this to put the blame on someone else instead of me. i understand the 'its my fault mode. the " i'm blaming someone else for what i brought on myself". Larry i hear those same voices. i hear abuser 1 and 2 voices, my 'mother's' voice and my own.
stomachs queasy now.
i get angry just thinking about this because it happened many times and i think that i was given that many times to 'get away', to stop it, but i didn't. therefore, i must have liked it, wanted it, therefore nothing Bad did happen....
see how i rationalize?Racer, i'm so sorry your going for 'help' has made your life more difficult.
but dear one i know you are strong. you Are a survivor.b2c
poster:B2chica
thread:648011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060517/msgs/648344.html