Posted by happyflower on May 19, 2006, at 20:35:36
In reply to A new male T - a wish, posted by orchid on May 19, 2006, at 16:21:47
Well this is just my 2 cents but I think looking for a father figure to help your fathers issues is a good thing and can make you feel good.
The only thing is that if you look for a T to fill that need, it will eventually break your heart because you won't be able to get what you really need from them because it is a perfessional relationship, not a personal one. If you start to have daughter like feelings for them, then somedsay the relationship will have to end. I know you know how painful termination is even if it goes well the way it should go, do you really want to put yourself in that situation again?
I have found father figures through out my entire life that I still have contact with. There is even this fitness instructor that says I remind him of his daugher and he wants me to call him dad. It is kinda cute.
I think getting married to an older man will probably not get that need met either. My husband is over 20 years older than me, and I am the adult in the relationship, he is more like a child.
I think when you are older and have kids of your own, the need for a parental figure will lessen somewhat for you. At least it did for me.
Now I do think going into therapy again would be a good idea, if it is to help you, not look for a personal relationship. Good luck
poster:happyflower
thread:645986
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060517/msgs/646069.html