Posted by muffled on December 5, 2005, at 11:42:23
In reply to Re: I read **trigger**Suffer the little inner children » muffled, posted by cricket on December 3, 2005, at 9:39:59
> First - This is about BPD. I have no official diagnosis. I don't know whether I have BPD or DID or both or neither. Since I think that diagnoses are more useful to insurance companies than to individuals, I have no desire to have a diagnosis.
***Yeah, I'm with you. My T is the same also, she calls them 'labels'. My T keeps giving me bpd materials.
>
> I do know that I have what I have always called "voices". Some young, some not so young. Various voices function in different aspects of my life. For example, I have my work self who feels completely separate and different from the kid self who wants to come to your forest.
***You can hear them? For me its just like static in my head. But not much these days. I can communicate, but not very well.> Tone - Preachy. The "You" are this, "You" are that. You must do this. Just like the author did. It switches back and forth from an accusation by the reader's inner child "You hit me, etc." to a very firm statement by the author on what the reader's problem is "You have abandoned your inner child" to an emphatic directive on what the reader must do to "save" themselves.
***Yeah, it was real disturbing and accusatory.
>
> Melodramatic - "Cowering in the dark recesses of your being" "You are thrusting out toward the agony" Ugh. This felt like daytime trash television.
***Yeah, way over the top. Glad you think so too.
>
> I know that for me hearing different voices in my head made me feel like a bit of a circus freak. I think in some cases articles like these contributed to that feeling.
***:( You not a freak. I'm REALLY struggling with the freak thing right now cuz my T. asked for the first time last week if my kid wanted to talk. I'd been hinting bout an inside me. Freaked the pissy hell out of me. I don't know what to say or do. If my kid talks to her then she gonna think I a freak. I gonna think I a freak. This whole thing is crazy to me. I only found out that the head noise was fighting etc. very recently. I'm trying not to reject kid cuz it really hurts her, but its just so weird.:(
>
> The article also reminded me of why I avoided therapy for so many years. The whole "self-help" tone of you are damaged, love yourself, find the inner strength to heal yourself, I will guide you on the inner journey repulses and nauseates me. It feels hollow and condescending, crass, commercial, even snake oil salesmanish.
***yeah
>
> What I have found helpful
>
> Contemplation and discussion on the nature of the self.
> Is it a self-created fictive entity? Why do some of us perceive ourselves as multiple while most people perceive themselves as singular? What is my relationship to the voices? Am I just another voice? Or do I act more as the container for them?
***I think I'm the main person. I think the kids been around since I don't know when. Thats what the head noise was. Thats why I was always so conflicted and confused.
>
> Alex and I have discussed some of this. I've discussed some with my T and I've just sat and thought a lot.
***Yeah Alex has amde me REALLY think on stuff.
>
> Listening to the voices.
> I guess I agree a bit with the article here. I do try and listen. Each voice has his or her own unique point of view. They often have something valuable to say even if some are not very articulate or gentle in their communication. Are they always right? No, no more than any individual is always right. Do I automatically do what they say? No, absolutely not. Maybe that's easier for me because it's rarely just one voice nagging away but multiple voices with different and often conflicting desires that I must negotiate.
***Sounds very confusing and tiring for you. I thought my kid was so honest and everything until I got to know her and shes just as full of sh*t as the next guy all right.>
> Talking here on Babble. Even those who don't have the same issues have helped me tremendously.
***Yeah, people are nice here and accepting. I learn lots from reading.
>
> I know that my reaction to articles like this is very subjective. So, muffled, if you are still reading I hope you or anyone else doesn't take offense. If these types of things are helpful, please ignore everything I have said.
***Nah, I agree. Thanks for taking the time to write. I don't feel so bad.
>
> Also, please keep talking to us Muffled.
***Thanks again. I will. Just sometimes its hard is all.
Thanks for sharing cricket.
Muffled.
poster:muffled
thread:584583
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051130/msgs/585719.html