Posted by Shortelise on April 27, 2005, at 0:19:38
In reply to Why would anyone like me? **Trigger**, posted by pinkeye on April 26, 2005, at 16:10:02
((pinkeye))
I just hate this for you.
But I'll tell you this: we choose our friends.
I hope you chose you therapist.
Any so-called friends of mine who suddenly find themselves indisposed when I am going through a rough spot are off the invitation list for New Years Eve!
Pinkeye, we make it what it is. It's not like there's some pattern lain out by the universe that we are forced to follow. No one points a finger and says, you are going to be friends with him and her and her and him. The woman at your favourite cafe might be your best friend - you just don't know it yet - you kow the one - she always notices when you're having a bad day. Or maybe there is no one like that you've noticed, maybe because you're not looking, or maybe because you're so sure that you're unloveable that you send out those vibes.
You could try a day where you look everyone in the eye - strangers as well as people you like. Look 'em all in the eye, and send a friendly look, a "I'm a nice person" look. Real in the eye stuff, real open, see what's in here, look at what's out there.
WHen I first started doing this, it amazedme how many people responded with kindness as soon as they understood that I was going to be nice. As soon as I let my guard down, and showed them how soft and kind I am in here, wow, most of them, not all, but most were just as gentle. I can go for coffee any day of the week and feel ... better. Just walking to a cafe, just being open and saying hello to others, looking them in the face, seeing them, actually seeing them instead of looking through them as I often used to do because I was afraid they were going to sneer or snub or ignore me.
Ok, it's my experience, and I don't know what yours is, and pinkeye, I am so so so sad for you that you feel no one cares. But I believe a lot of people may feel something like this too.
((pinkeye))
ShortE
poster:Shortelise
thread:489919
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050420/msgs/490199.html