Posted by cricket on April 20, 2005, at 11:31:43
In reply to Re: Bad Session with T » cricket, posted by Dinah on April 20, 2005, at 10:43:35
It was hurtful. And you're right, if he is frustrated and overwhelmed he either should refer me on to someone else or get help. I know that his wife just had a baby a couple of weeks ago but once again not my issue not my problem.
And I need help. I am dealing with some, big scary things right now and he's got to know that.
I won't call him. I almost didn't survive the one phone call I've made in 3 years. He has a remarkable way of twisting things back onto me. "I get one sentence a month out of you. And everything you do say is a conversation stopper. 85% of you doesn't want to be here."
There have been moments when it's been better, but it really feels like he has reached the fed-up stage.
So I will go in there next week and try to speak my mind. I will say, "I know that I have a problem opening up and maybe I haven't said a lot but I think that you are so fed up with me that you don't hear anything I say anyway."
How does that sound? I am so bad at these things.
And you are absolutely right there is something freeing about a relationship being at such a low point. That's what's helping me get through this day. I can say what I need to say because it can't possibly get any worse.
It's funny as I left yesterday in tears and shaking. He said, "What is all this grief about?"
I didn't really know at that point. But now it occurs to me that it's about him. I lost the possibility of a relationship with him. That's what the grief was about.
Sorry for going on and on. I'm just trying to work it all through.
poster:cricket
thread:486548
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050420/msgs/486969.html