Posted by crushedout on February 17, 2005, at 20:41:37
For those of you who've followed this mini-drama....I had my third date with the second woman last night (after basically -- although not perfectly -- ending things with the first woman on Sunday). It was a little disappointing. She was kind of distant physically. Like when I kissed her. And I didn't know why. She explained that she wasn't feeling well (female problems) but that she still wanted me to sleep over. So I did. We mostly talked, mostly about sex, and we laughed a lot. So, despite my disappointment about the sex part, it was pretty fun. But there was a hard part. I felt too vulnerable and needy, I think.
And today, I'm feeling horribly depressed. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that she had so much nice stuff, and such a nice apartment, and she has a career, and basically seems to have her sh*t together, and it made me feel incredibly inferior. I know this sounds silly but it's really upsetting and poisoning my hopes about her. I *really* like her though.
And now she's going out of town and I'm feeling bad about myself and depressed and lonely, and there's this other woman who really, really likes me and wants to see me. How can I say no? I feel very scared and insecure, and I feel like this would make me feel less vulnerable, if I sleep with the first woman and remind myself of how *she* was making me feel (which was: uneasy but also very good about myself). I think it would really make me feel safer. I feel too scared. (I also really *like* #1, don't get me wrong. Don't think I'm a total *ssh*le.)
I'm so confused. I'm a wreck. I think I might also be getting sick.
Help?
poster:crushedout
thread:459599
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050211/msgs/459599.html